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Why being bisexual has nothing to do with being promiscuous or confused

Bisexuality encompasses those subjects who have the capacity to love people of both their own sex and of another sex. This capacity may include physical, sexual and emotional attraction. Bisexuality does not imply the renunciation of one’s own sex or the denial of one’s role as a man or a woman, which means that, in some cases, those who choose this sexual mode tend to hide their practices so as not to affect their heterosexual facet in front of the environment.

Certainly, this sexual inclination does not concern the social gender to which one belongs. It is a psychological mechanism in which we can both find a predominance of confusion regarding sexual desires in which feelings are intertwined – this appreciation of bisexuality as confusion would lead us to the existence of certain ambiguity in the early construction of their identity – and, from another point of view, we could see it as an attempt to expand and expand the erotic world and the search for new experiences.

However, it is one thing to go through a stage of confusion and quite another that bisexuality is in itself and structurally a confusion. In essence, bisexuality is a sexual orientation like homosexuality and heterosexuality.

How do I know if I am bisexual?

Being bisexual does not define our lifestyle or our sexual behavior. Bisexual people can be monogamous, polyamorous or even celibate, just as heterosexuals, lesbians and gays are. Many bisexuals have sexual relations with people of only one sex or with no one at all, and still consider themselves bisexual. Others, on the other hand, have relationships with people of both sexes and do not identify as bisexual.

At different stages of life we may be attracted to both sexes

Being bisexual does not define our lifestyle or our sexual behavior.
It is wrong to hold the belief that bisexuality borders on perversion by transgressing acceptable codes or to place it around the idea of sexual voracity or compulsion. Likewise, it is also wrong to conjecture -prejudiciously- that in all cases it would be a repressed and displaced homosexuality.

Defining our sexuality is a profound process that in some cases can be very complex. There is a strong cultural and social determinism that expects us to be biologically, generically and sexually male or female.

Why being bisexual has nothing to do with being promiscuous or confused.
However, at different stages of life we can be attracted to both sexes. This is usually seen in childhood sexual play (where we may feel desire and play it out, either with our cousin or grade school classmate) or in puberty where at the same time we fall head over heels in love with our first (heterosexual) love we develop intense eroticism with our gender peers. Attractions may change over time with the tendency being to conform to the heterosexual pyramidal model with an inclination towards monogamy.

The nuances

If we take bisexuality as a choice that involves the sexual acts of the subject in question and that is part of his sexual and social identity, we should enroll it within the different types of sexual modality: hetero, homo bi, transex, transvestism, etc. In these processes, the subject expands the area of his or her sexual desire towards both sexes although, in most cases, there is always a tendency towards one sex more than the other. The subject assumes himself to be hetero or homo and, at the same time, extends his sexual practice to the other sex.

This type of sexual experience tends to be reserved socially since it does not have – until today – an acceptance of the social media in which we move. Therefore, the subject manages his gender condition outwardly or agrees with his partner the possibility of including experiences of sexual exchange that allow him to develop his sexual appetite.

Sexual fantasies

Although statistics say that more men fall within this particularity, the fact is that women have more eroticism towards our fellow women. Women can talk, make contact, show affection, touch, kiss and even share sex with women more than men can with each other.

Bisexuality encompasses those subjects who have the capacity to love people of both their own sex and of another sex.

At this point, and beyond the definition and development of bisexuality as a sexual and social structure, it is important and interesting to talk about the place of same-sex partners in the imaginary of all of us. In fact, we are considered to be essentially bisexual in our structure regardless of how close or far we are from this recognition and the permission we give ourselves to inhabit it. And I say to inhabit it, I do not say to realize it, I do not speak of making it an act. I add -and I emphasize- that fantasies are a first-order safe-conduct in the enrichment of our eroticism; that sheltering and playing with the illusory adds and enables permissions; that does not mean that deploying them implies having to make them come true and that imagination is the place where our senses move at ease.

We all have the capacity to love and desire both sexes without this being an attack against our chosen heterosexuality. It is only a matter of offering us the possibility of exercising it in greater freedom.

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